Learning that your child may need therapy can feel overwhelming. When you and your co-parent disagree about treatment, uncertainty over who can decide may delay needed support. In California, the answer usually depends on your custody order.
What does your custody order require?
Joint legal custody gives you and your co-parent a role in major choices about your child’s health, school and welfare. Still, both parents do not have to approve every health care choice.
Your order should identify which decisions require mutual consent. If it requires agreement before starting or ending therapy, neither parent should make that change alone.
If your order does not require both parents to agree, either parent may generally approve routine care. Major choices, such as starting therapy, can still lead to conflict. Discussing the plan first may help you avoid a dispute.
Additionally, minors 12 and older may independently consent to their own outpatient therapy. A mental health professional must find that the child is mature enough to participate, and decide that involving a parent would be inappropriate or that earlier efforts failed.
What can you do if you disagree?
Start by reviewing the exact wording of your custody order. Share your concerns and information from the therapist or doctor in writing. You can also discuss treatment goals, scheduling, costs and access to records. These steps may help you reach an agreement before court involvement.
What happens when you still cannot agree?
If the disagreement continues, you may ask the court to clarify or change decision-making authority through a Request for Order. In Los Angeles County, parents attend confidential Child Custody Mediation, where the mediator does not make recommendations to the judge. This is distinct from Child Custody Recommending Counseling used in many other California counties, where local court rules authorize the counselor to submit a written recommendation to the judge if the parents cannot reach an agreement.
Keeping your child’s care on track
Your custody order is the starting point for decisions about therapy. Reviewing its terms and addressing disagreements early can help prevent delays in your child’s care. When the language is unclear or the conflict continues, guidance from a legal professional can help clarify each parent’s authority and the options for moving forward.