Announcing to your children that you and your spouse are going to get divorced is not an easy conversation to have. The kids may not really understand how to process it and it can be stressful for everyone — even when you and your spouse know that divorce is right for you and you’re committed to it.
But it’s important to remember that the children need more than just one conversation. They’re going to have questions, worries and concerns to work through in the weeks and months to come. As a parent, it is important for you to know how to address these things with them.
For instance, children need to know that they are loved. Don’t assume they know it. They may feel like you don’t love them and that’s why you’re splitting up. Assure them that they did not cause the divorce and that this just means they’ll be fully loved by two parents in two homes. Other questions they may ask include:
- Do they need to move to a new house?
- Is the divorce their fault?
- Do they need to go to a new school?
- Will they see both of you often?
- Can they change your mind?
- Are they safe and secure?
Remember that kids can’t always voice their questions. They may worry about safety and security but have no idea how to say it. Make sure you watch their attitudes and respond to how they act. Show them that they are loved and safe at all times.
Divorce with children can get complicated and it’s very important to understand your rights as a parent.